'Britney Spears' Category
Mira bags her baby
Just because your baby fits in a handbag, doesn’t mean he should be shoved in there… let’s hope Mira Sorvino doesn’t give Britney parenting tips anytime soon! I can see it now:
- Y’all… I lost my purse. You’ve got to help me… Sean P. was in it!
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Britney finds love with a rocker
Britney’s gonna have to face it… she’s addicted to love… even in rehab she managed to find another gold digger love affair!
Troubled bald Brit has found shelter in the arms of a rocker she met in AA, and plans to move in with him once she’s out of rehab, according to close sources.
Who is Jason Filyaw… apart from one soon-to-be-rich LA guitar player? Check out his myspace page here. He’s the 33-year-old lead guitarist of the rock band Riva. Ah Brit.. once a groupie, always a groupie.
“Britney adores Jason,” according to a close source. “He’s been a tower of strength for her at the lowest point in her life. She’s convinced Jason can help her through rehab because as an alcoholic, he’s been through the same thing.”
The source says Spears e-mails and phones her rocker boy constantly, and that he calls her Sugar, Kitten and My Lady while she calls him Mr. Secret Underground Guy and J-Sun. The guy’s moving in fast! Wonder if Britney’s "new transformation" will be rocker chick?
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Britney has a small bladder
Even though she doesn’t brink booze anymore, Britney still takes frequent potty breaks.
She can’t go anywhere without demanding the driver stop to let her out for a tinkle. Even while being driven around rehab staff, she forced a break at a Catholic church in Pacific Palisades so she could relieve herself. What look is she going for here? A Unabomber version of the Olsens?
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Britney digging deep with journal
So you’re Britney Spears. You’ve it rock bottom. You’ve shaved your head and quite possibly run through rehab declaring yourself the Antichrist. How to turn this around?
A girl’s best friend — her journal. Yes, Brit Brit is pouring her Southern soul into writing at the Promises Center, and her entourage is desperately hoping some hits can be gleaned from the writings.
I’m sure her food cravings and daily razor routine will make for great songs: "A Shave for You" or "Toxic Twinkie"!
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Hollywood’s white trash couple to reunite
Brit and Kevin… they can’t stay apart. They’re like greasy food and finger lickin’. McDonald’s and big belches.
Lost and lonely in rehab amidst rumors she’s trying to kill herself, Britney is reaching out for Kevin. Hard. Calling him her "rock". Sources say he shaved his head in solidarity to their new "bond".
A source said, "She has been talking to Kevin every night for hours on the phone (from rehab) telling him she still loves him. She just wants to be with him again and thinks having another baby will seal their marriage."
Another one? Isn’t she trying to claim the drug use is all because of post-partum depression and not just because she loves to party, y’all?
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Britney steps out to AA meeting
Aww… our girl’s growing up! Brit Brit dressed as a slutty ragamuffin for her first assisted AA meeting Wednesday night. And it gets better! Being Brit, she showed off several clothing/body clues about her state of mind just to make sure she’s talked about/discussed/analyzed!
1. A band on her wedding finger, sparking talk that she and Federline are trying to mend their rocky relationship.
2. Scrawled flower doodles all over her hands. This could mean she’s joined the Hari Krishnas and can’t tell the difference between ink and henna tattoos, or it could simply be that she’s bored in all her rehab classes and likes to draw on herself!
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Britney’s first husband cashes in
Now that the entire world knows Britney has a drug problem, first husband — for a second — Jason Alexander suddenly remembers details about her drug use!
Endless details… he could go on and on! "We used ecstasy at night to party and cocaine during the day to stay awake," Alexander said. "Then we would take downers like Valium or Vicodin to come down and rest."
"She definitely had a problem with drugs when we were together."
He claims Spears almost had a fatal overdose on "MDMA," or pure ecstasy, while they partied in a Las Vegas club. He had to help her up to their hotel suite and said she was sweating and having problems breathing.
"I took her into the bathroom and threw her in the shower," Alexander said. "She was unconscious. She tripped and fell. I was trying to hold her up and speak to her. She wasn’t moving."
"I remember looking down at her all crumpled in the tub with the water coming down. She looked so white and lifeless. I thought she was dead. I thought, ‘This bitch is going to f**king die right here in front of me.’"
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He also recalls sexy threesomes with Britney and her backup dancers: "They were squeezing her tits and ass. I was sitting off to the side, buzzed and watching it all go down. Britney and this girl were having some lesbian fun, so I did what every other straight guy would do — I dropped my pants and hopped right into the middle of it and enjoyed every second."
It’s amazing Britney let this one go. What a loser!
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Jim Carrey ponders Britney fascination
See Jim Carrey rip Conan a new one for mocking pathetic celebs. See Conan be labeled an "Ass". I feel better now!
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Federline visits Britney in rehab
Kevin Federline stopped by Promises to see Britney today and hung out an hour and a half. "He cares a lot about her," according to a source.
"Britney scared everyone pretty bad. Kevin is worried that’s for sure," the source goes on. "Kevin just wants her to be OK. He loves her, so however she can get better is just what we’ll have to accept. [They] will make it work with the kids – it’s all still for them."
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Britney’s dad deepens the mystery
Britney’s father called his daughter "a sick little girl" today. He added, "We’re just trying to take care of her."
He next said her problems are "not about what other people think".
Hmm… something unexpected for the Britney Tell-All that’s inevitably to follow?
