'Jessica Simpson' Category
Jessica’s back to blonde
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And she’s showing off her camel toe to celebrate returning to ditz mode!
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John’s vacation album
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Here I am in Australia… today I ran to the beach for a quick dip to wash Jessica’s slimy body dessert lotion off me… she’s always rubbing that stuff on my chest… I don’t want to smell like cheesecake!
Jessica’s finally getting better at that walking thing… she only needs help every once and awhile, when she forgets to put one foot in front of the other!
No vacation is complete without a little stroll down the beach, looking sex-ay.. might as well try to grab a few more Australian sales of my CD! G’day from Down Under — Jessica’s asking me to wipe her now!
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The Boobsey Twins go Down Under
Jessica’s tagging along behind John on his tour in Australia so they can continue their goofy-eyed make out sessions around the world. These two are getting really boring! Even the bird behind Jessica is yawning…
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Jessica + airplane meal = air rage
Nick and Vanessa had a mini-freak out when it was announced that Jessica’s movie "Employee of the Month" was the on-flight flick during their recent first class flight from New York to Los Angeles.
A fellow passenger said: "Nick and Vanessa were visibly freaked out and started whispering furiously to each other."
The flight attendants noticed their reaction and quickly huddled in the galley for an emergency meeting.
Moments later they announced: "Ladies and gentleman, due to technical difficulties with our in-flight movie, we will instead be showing "Badidas"! Nick had a technical difficulty with having to watch Jessica giggle, burp and baby-talk for two hours onscreen!
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Jessica lugs a ginormous bag
That sack is big enough to rival Cisco Adler’s!
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Jessica and John: so happy together?
Jessica’s a John copycat… first her hair, now she’s attempting the sarcastic smirk… so lame!
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Celebrity Feud of the Day
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Suddenly the hair extension market is a bimbo hot spot. Paris is rivaling Jessica Simpson’s Hairdon’t line of nasty clip ons with her own unique offering: Dream Catchers. Because you know she’s feeling her Native American roots!
Who is she trying to sell those things to? Little Miss Muffet?
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Of course Jess doesn’t speak Italian
And John decided it was time to leave after she barged into an Italian men’s room for the tenth time, complaining the drawing on the the door was in a foreign language and impossible to figure out!
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The boobsy twins invade Rome
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Jessica Simpson and John Mayer are doing the romance thing these days, strolling hand in hand in Rome, where they are on currently vacationing together.
The couple arrived at the Leonardo da Vinci Airport this morning and lingered over a romantic lunch at famed restaurant Dal Bolognese for more than two hours before John dragged a black suited Jessica through the streets as she whined, "My feet huuuurt!"
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Did Jessica switch dogs?
Did ditzy Jessica pull a Paris/Tinkerbell and "lose" her dog Daisy, only to replace her with another? The new version of Daisy looks strangely different from this older one from "Newlyweds".
Jessica can’t tell though! Managers probably just put another dog in her sleeping arms and told her she was given a new version of Daisy from the Dog Fairy…
